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Humility and all that Jazz
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| At #TheConversation Ibadan |
African Feminism is still largely about pounded yam, amala, dodo, skirt-and-trouser, and bad marriages.
That is where we are as a people- food to chop and who’s
gonna cook it, serve it and wipe the ass after poop.
And when we are not talking about food, we are talking
demeanour.
You know, be a successful woman but be humble. That kind of
stuff.
-Because we do not truly understand what humility is, we
rant about docility, slavery and entitlements instead.
Humility is not when a woman dumps her education inside a box to
become a housewife. That is sacrifice and choice.
Humility is not surviving 25 years of domestic abuse just to
finally hear the words, “I am sorry” during your silver jubilee of "enduring
love". You could have died in those years!
Humility is not when you allow people walk all over you then
YOU join a choir of forgiveness. That’s probably YOU in dire need of some
chutzpah.
Accepting that you are a little inferior to another gender
is not humility.
I’m sorry Nigerians, but humility is not when you take old people’s
advice or crouch on your knees the minute you see a grey strand on their heads or a lot of hair in their nostrils. That’s tradition; and it happens to you
involuntarily.
Humility is the ability to allow others win through your own
success.
It is spreading your own wings, so they can fly with you.
Humility is a skill. It gives room for others, it rejoices
with others, it makes way for others, celebrate others, finds what makes them
tick and gives them a platform to twinkle.
Humility is accepting there are others who have interesting
insight on a subject you are passionate about; and the confidence to share your
platform with them.
It has nothing to do with taking a wayward partner back
or accepting a lot of shit in your personal space.
We spend too much time worried about whether people come with
a dose of humility or not, and we miss the fraud and depravity that transpire in
the midst of flamboyant ass-licking ventures.
Humility is sharing your story, even if it isn’t popular to
do so.
And so, I’ll like to thank those who share a bit of themselves every time we hold #TheConversation in different cities- Lagos, Abuja and Ibadan.
We record some of the toughest stories, retold in different
ways and by different people from one city to the next.
We had another successful event at Ibadan. You shall find
the downloads on www.happenings.com.ng today and for the next few days. We split them in parts.
Below is my opening speech. My words where pouring too fast.
I think I was conscious of the fact that we were heading back to Lagos same
day.
I talked about my mother (who I love dearly), women who fight other women, and a
bit of my experiences here and there.
I hope you find something in there.
Joy I say again e no go better for anybody wey say e no go better for you!
ReplyDeleteI came across your letter to Nigerian youth and ma'am I have started reading books!
I don't just want to be another celebrity, I want to be a celebrity with a substance!
Am reading and my intellect is coming back!
Thank you ma!
I am your anonymous fan who can only like your post on Facebook because your fb settings won't allow people following you to comment . Lol
thanks alot. I truly appreciate.
DeleteNot sure if it's me but the recording keeps skipping back to the beginning. Never gets past 4 mins ;(
ReplyDeleteHa! Please try again. I think it's the internet :)
Delete